Attending (an expensive) Drake concert reminded me that time away from your child/ren and doing your own thing once in a while can help you develop new interests you can monetize, learn new skills, and ease your mind. All of these can help you be good to you, so you can be great for them. Especially as a single mom.
I’ve been a single mom for 10 years now and have taken some useful advice into consideration. Hopefully some of this advice can help you too.
TAKE ALLLLLLLL the help.
Take help from your mama, a fellow baby mama, a fellow single mama, SNAP, whatever. Most of the debt I have now is from not asking for help due to embarrassment. Meanwhile, the people you’re trying to hide your troubles from ain’t stupid. They know you’re broke. There is no future in frontin. Take the help. How? Let your friends treat you sometimes. When people ask what kids want for the holidays, tell them. Ask for gift cards to Amazon, Best Buy, whatever. Use your friends talents when they offer them, use someone’s Netflix password when they offer, or their AMC Moviepass. They love you and want to see you well. Activate your squad.
Broke and broken are not the same.
A few days, weeks or even months of lean times happen to everyone. When you can’t make the ends meet and it’s wearing on your spirit, you can no longer be resourceful, can’t get up outta the bed, and you need more support. Step into that space. Professional (mental and emotional) support can be super helpful. Love yourself and those that love you by seeking help to help you navigate this course. Therapy, life coaching, restorative chats, they all do a lot for healing.
Don’t be afraid to splurge on yourself.
And learn to do it without guilt! For the record, that Drake concert was awesome. I ain’t even know most of the songs, I was home early, and I still had a good damn time. You deserve time to be a grownup. It actually can help improve your parenting. With planning and support, you CAN be both a parent and an individual. Seeking your own interests will role model for your child(ren) too.
Take Advantage of FREE things in your community
Look for and attend free classes, events, and movie nights in your community. Find a bogo happy hour spot and enjoy a drink – or five. Take advantage of free!